And Your First Domino Is…
My coworkers used to call me Mayor Miller, and I always had a pretty good laugh about it. That was before even I thought about becoming a leader; it wasn’t part of my vision. I asked them why they called me that, and they gave me examples of how great of a leader I already was. I was kind and patient; I always had time for them to listen to their stories or struggles in their personal or professional life. I didn’t mind taking my time and helping them with a project or brainstorming a solution. As I thought more about what they said, I decided to sign up for the upcoming supervisory training. There was no way I could become a supervisor at my current job, but I knew I wouldn’t be working there forever. I had nothing to lose and maybe something to gain.
As time went by, I took leadership training, signed up to be part of the Women Leadership group and other committees, and asked leaders I had already built a relationship with what else I needed to do to be ready and to be qualified to become the leader. I realized I couldn’t let it go, so I went on a quest to discover the calling. I continued to absorb knowledge from everything and everyone. I was driven and dedicated. I wanted to become a leader who could help others in the workplace, especially those whose skills are often overlooked because of bias. Every night I imagined getting the job as a leader and making a change in the organization. My imagination had no limits, but sure it didn’t match reality. Many disappointments later, I finally got my first job as a manager.
That was over a decade ago.
When Steve Chandler interviewed Arnold Schwarzenegger back in the 1970s, Steve asked him what his plan was after he retired from bodybuilding. Arnold said he would be “the number-one box-office star in all of Hollywood.” A little baffled, Steve asked him how he was going to do it, to which Arnold replied:
“It’s the same process I used in bodybuilding. What you do is create a vision of who you want to be, and then live into that picture as if it were already true” (Steve Chandler, “100 Ways to Motivate Yourself”).
Have you ever imagined yourself following your dream, having a dream job that brings the feeling of fulfillment and accomplishment? Have you ever created a vision of the life you’d love and lived and breathed that vision every day?
When I started my leadership journey, I didn’t think about having a vision and following it. Yes, I imagined being a leader, but I had no idea what kind of effect imaging has on your brain and heart. I just knew I wanted to be a leader, and there was a process that I needed to follow to get the job I wanted. It was that simple.
A few years ago, as I was going through difficult times, I started to practice meditation, read self-discovery books and learned from Brené Brown and Simon Sinek. I began to practice what Arnold talked about in the 70s, mindfully imagining myself being the person, mother, friend, leader, and coach I wanted to be. I was already that person in my vision as the reality unfolded in front of my eyes.
It took time, dedication, and often courage to open your heart and let the walls go down. The job is not done and never will be completed because there is always so much more internal work that I’m looking forward to doing.
I’m honored to be part of the community of people who chose me as their coach or leader. It’s a privilege to sit across from them, listen to their stories, and watch them grow and transform. I’m proud of myself for finding the courage to stay on this not-so-easy journey, follow my calling, and stay open-hearted.
What is the smallest step you can take to move closer to your dream? What changes could you make in your day-to-day life to start creating the life you love? What is the first domino I can help you to knock down that will help to set your dream in motion?
Remember, begin before you are ready!
